A couple from Minneapolis decided to go to Florida for a long weekend to thaw out during one particularly icy winter. They planned to stay at the very same hotel where they spent their honeymoon 20 years ago. Because both had jobs they found it difficult coordinating their travel schedules. It was decided that the husband would fly to Florida on a Thursday, and his wife would follow him the next day. Upon arriving as planned, the husband checked into the hotel. In his room there was a ...

A couple from Minneapolis decided to go to Florida for a long weekend to thaw out during one particularly icy winter. They planned to stay at the very same hotel where they spent their honeymoon 20 years ago. Because both had jobs they found it difficult coordinating their travel schedules. It was decided that the husband would fly to Florida on a Thursday, and his wife would follow him the next day. Upon arriving as planned, the husband checked into the hotel. In his room there was a ...

Recently I’ve been working on resource allocation estimates for our next phase of work. This is basically an estimate of how many people are needed for each task for a three-month development cycle. For example, Task A may need 1.5 heads, while Task B might need 0.5. So I finish the estimate, and my boss shows it to his boss. We get a response along the lines of, “No that’s not right. You only have X number of heads to allocate. Change your estimates so that your total is X.” Thi...

Recently I’ve been working on resource allocation estimates for our next phase of work. This is basically an estimate of how many people are needed for each task for a three-month development cycle. For example, Task A may need 1.5 heads, while Task B might need 0.5. So I finish the estimate, and my boss shows it to his boss. We get a response along the lines of, “No that’s not right. You only have X number of heads to allocate. Change your estimates so that your total is X.” Thi...

Scrappleface has an early analysis of the 9/11 Commission report: 9/11 Report Calls for Hiring Imaginative Evil People (2004-07-22) -- The 9/11 commission report released today blames the 2001 terror attacks on a "failure of imagination" among government officials, and urges intelligence agencies to "hire more evil people who could effectively anticipate acts of unrestrained wickedness." According to the report, America is vulnerable to terrorism because the CIA and FBI are filled...

Scrappleface has an early analysis of the 9/11 Commission report: 9/11 Report Calls for Hiring Imaginative Evil People (2004-07-22) -- The 9/11 commission report released today blames the 2001 terror attacks on a "failure of imagination" among government officials, and urges intelligence agencies to "hire more evil people who could effectively anticipate acts of unrestrained wickedness." According to the report, America is vulnerable to terrorism because the CIA and FBI are filled...

As seen in a cat's diary: Day 183 of my captivity... My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal. The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape, and the mild satisfaction I get from ruining the occasional piece of furniture. Tomorrow I may eat another house plant. Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while they were walking almost succeeded -- must try ...

As seen in a cat's diary: Day 183 of my captivity... My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal. The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape, and the mild satisfaction I get from ruining the occasional piece of furniture. Tomorrow I may eat another house plant. Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while they were walking almost succeeded -- must try ...

A man walks into a church confessional and says to the priest, "Bless me, father, for I have sinned. I was with seven different women last night." The priest is silent for a moment, then says, "Go home and cut seven lemons in half. Squeeze the juice into a glass and drink it down in one gulp." "And I'll be forgiven?" asks the man. "No," replies the priest, "but it will wipe that %#@*&^ smirk off your face."

A man walks into a church confessional and says to the priest, "Bless me, father, for I have sinned. I was with seven different women last night." The priest is silent for a moment, then says, "Go home and cut seven lemons in half. Squeeze the juice into a glass and drink it down in one gulp." "And I'll be forgiven?" asks the man. "No," replies the priest, "but it will wipe that %#@*&^ smirk off your face."

A friend of mine sent me the following quote that he encountered on some forum... As an atheist, I'm left up to my own moral devices. As a result, I personally slaughter twelve puppies a day, feed them to twelve other puppies, and then repeatedly stab the second set of puppies and have sex with the stab wounds. Without God as a compass, what other result is possible? I really should find a religion soon, because all these puppies are getting expensive. And I think the pet store owne...

A friend of mine sent me the following quote that he encountered on some forum... As an atheist, I'm left up to my own moral devices. As a result, I personally slaughter twelve puppies a day, feed them to twelve other puppies, and then repeatedly stab the second set of puppies and have sex with the stab wounds. Without God as a compass, what other result is possible? I really should find a religion soon, because all these puppies are getting expensive. And I think the pet store owne...

Rabidplaybunny87: Okay, so my neighbors officially hate me GarbageStan23: why? Rabidplaybunny87: Well, me, david and andrew were having a bonfire in the backyard, and we were making s'mores and all... and suddenly we here sirens, and see a firetruck turn into the street in front of us. Rabidplaybunny87: So we all went running to see what was up, and our neigbor's house was on fire! GarbageStan23: oh ****! Rabidplaybunny87: Yeah, and when we got there, the wife was crying into her husband...